A daily space of juggling the sadness of a season/situation yet committed to pursuing God and health – living grieved. Not living in grief over a past event/s rather the struggle of an ongoing hurt/s with no known expiration date. Functioning and despairing at the same time. It hovers, it nags, it haunts, it lingers. An ever-present cloud that never dissipates but moves in and out of your peripheral vision that conceals truth, consumes hope and distorts perspective. It is discouraging, draining, defeating and destructive. Living grieved.

If living grieved is part of our reality, can it be done well? Is there a purpose behind it? Is there something to be gleaned from it to ease the angst and discomfort and sadness? What do we do with it?

God is grieved, so we are not alone. Yet, he abounds in grace, mercy, joy, forgiveness and love. Could God be calling us deeper with Him, could He be revealing more of His unlimited and complex character as a fellow griever? Could we be taking on more of Him, is He entrusting more of Him in us?

How we thirst for the God of grace, to receive His unmerited favor. What about the God of Forgiveness - the answer to condemnation and shame. The God of provision is so rich and generous in our lives. The God of healing that can provide deep relief in our physical and emotional wounds. The God of love who tells us we are acceptable, we are cherished, we are His beloved and His love is unlimited, unconditional, and understanding. These parts of our God have changed us and transformed us and sustain us.

What about the God who grieves? Our God grieved all throughout the Old Testament over the sinfulness of man. The God who grieves today over our disobedience, our “lostness”, our pain and loneliness. What value or reward or potential opportunity for transformation lies within journeying with our God who grieves? Is it time to grow again? Have we allowed ourselves to be too celebratory of the God we already know, the God of grace and mercy and love, that we have stunted our growth in Him? No doubt living grieved can make us closer to Him but could it make us more like Him – a fellow griever?

It’s one thing to function while sad, but can we live, love and grow at the same time? I know God does not want us to continually endure but sometimes those hurts last long and if we are merely enduring through those lengthy seasons, we aren’t living.

Living grieved has the potential to create such an awareness of how we are conducting our own lives. Knowing the deep discomfort of an ongoing hurt or disappointment or a series of these that keep piling up – maybe we can use that in returning our love to God by cleaning up shop - by renewing our dedication to an obedient life. Could that sadness motivate us, even in the slightest way, to be better for Jesus?

Is it possible to take some solace in this difficult season knowing Jesus is inviting us to such a special place with Him? A place that is not for the mild or meek, a place that takes courage and perseverance to navigate, a place grounded in troubled reality clouded with darkness - a place that has the ability to exponentially develop our character that makes us more like Him. And to take it a step further, could this growth, this entrusting lead to something beautiful? In this season of living grieved, I am honestly not sure – but it could. And if it does, all glory to God.

So we join Him. We gladly gather up those daily mercies, those many notches of forgiveness, the numerous reminders of His love and the strength that is unlimited in Him – awe, the good life. But we don’t end there. We agree to join Him in the not-so-pretty, the realities, the hurts with the goal to be closer, deeper, and trusted with more of Him. Could that something beautiful be transformative, full of influence and impact for our families, communities and the Kingdom of Christ? If He has anything to do with it, you bet.